Pandemic Training Diary Week 3 Days 2 & 3

Pandemic Training Diary
Week 3 Days 2 & 3
Day 2, Week 3 started out better. Got some sleep. Woke up with a lot less pain. It was still there, but manageable. Was also in a better mood. All that fighting through the darkness does pay off, though not always right away or in obvious ways. It was a rainy and windy day today so I could go outside and maintain social distancing. Felt up to a Dog Run. (See my past post at: https://www.facebook.com/HITTScarborough for a description of this exercise). Didn’t want to overdo it just because I felt better. Although tomorrow is a day off I don’t want to bring the extreme pain back and drop myself back into the darkness. So didn’t push too hard on the Dog Run. Did some Hill Sprints (You can just try walking up and down a hill in order to increase intensity) with Push Ups x 50. Only two sets instead of 4. Then Plyo Rock Jumps x 10 with Plyo Push Ups (I found two rocks with a gap between them for this one. Adds to the stretch. But you can just hop on your hands if you’re not up to full Plyometric Work.) Only 2 Sets again. Home for Lying Yoga Series and Meditate. Felt a bit tired and cranky afterwards, but no increase in pain. Broke my 36 Hour Fast with healthy and varied foods. Paperwork and writing. Didn’t go for a Walk again. It was damp and very cold outside and my joints are always particularly painful when it’s wet and cold. I walked Benji with Yoga Breathing and Stretching. Some more writing. Then Relaxation Yoga and Meditation. Read to wind down.
Day 3 was a full day off. Had another rough night, which meant more pain and a much darker mood. Part of being me at this point, of being a 58 year old who has lived enough life for double that, of dealing with the physical and psychological remnants of serious abuse when I was young and then abusing myself as a fighter and just living the life of a major risk taker, of never expecting to survive to this age, is that there are going to be terrible days, and learn to accept that. Today was one of those toll days. I could barely move and I had no desire to move or the slightest curiosity about the world. I also have to accept that, particularly now in these times when we’re trapped indoors and we’re more aware that the world can be a dangerous and sometimes terrible place. While Asperger’s gives me more of a penchant for being alone than most people, one of my prime, and very literal when I was young, escapes has always been to get outdoors into the wilderness. With the parks closed in Toronto and the weather gray and miserable, I can only get outdoors so often and for so long. For me that means finding new ways of keeping my mind from eating itself alive and me dwelling on the pain. My favourite fallbacks have been writing and reading. I’m mostly able to write, but reading has become very difficult for me in that my mind, especially later on, struggles to focus on even simple tasks. On days like today when I cannot summon even the energy and desire to do those things and it is too cold and wet to get outside, TV becomes my fallback. There’s much more substantial television being offered nowadays by the streaming services that I can watch TV without feeling too guilty about it. I detest the idea of wasted time and still very much need to engage my mind even if it cannot be made to focus on more useful pursuits. Today was a TV and nothing else day. The weather will get better eventually and I’ll be able to spend more free time outdoors. Until then Netflix will have to do. I kept my diet clean, which is an accomplishment on darker days when I so want to indulge in junk food.
That’s it for Days 2 & 3. So far I’m not great, but I’m okay...


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