Coming as it does today, at this time in my life, together with Raónraon, Hummingbird, Spirit of Wisdom’s message seems to me clear and yet nothing like simple. Coming as it does, after so many years of fighting, of getting up from so many beatings and so much suffering, and just going on, when defiance and rage were the twin fires in my belly, seem have gone dim and now out and nothing seems left but ashes and nothing seems left but numbness and darkness, when it seems finally time that I should just stop, just end, the Spirit of Wisdom and Raónraon seem here to remind me that on some days and in some moments there is no inspiration, there is no fire and all that there is for then, for such moments is to Go On. Or as a character from David Milch’s Deadwood movie said, in that Milchian profane and profound way. to “Not go out as a *@#t.”. Even if it never gets better, even if the accumulated pain seems nothing more to me than a pile of ashes and detritus that I have become b
